dougnoll’s posthaven

Segment 1: A Deeper, More Meaningful Relationship with the Public Sphere.  On this edition of The Doug Noll Show we speak with internationally acclaimed spiritual author and lecturer Marianne Williamson. Marianne recently threw herself into the political ring with a bid for Congress. She tells us it was exhilarating, challenging, and intense. She "made every rookie mistake in the book," but it confirmed her belief that people really do wish for a deeper, more open relationship with the public sphere. She felt heard during her campaign. Although she did not win, she is very proud of her campaign. She is not in denial about what she didn’t achieve, but also not in denial about what she did achieve.

During her campaign, among other topics she spoke about getting money out of politics, that we have become a legalized system of bribery and corruption, income inequality, that 1 in 5 American children live in poverty, and that Americans have the highest mass incarceration numbers in the world.

Segment 2: Church and State.  One of the hurdles she had to deal with in her bid for congress was the caricature of spirituality. In truth, the spiritual communities of this county have been the foundation of our greatest social justice movements. The Abolitionist Movement arose from the Quakers, as did the Women’s Suffrage movement. The Civil Rights Movement came from the Southern Christian Leadership conference. There is real confusion by what the separation of church and state means. It was never meant to suppress the spiritual conversation. It was meant to protect the government from undue influence from religious institutions as well as protect the practice of spirituality beliefs from government. Spirituality is simply the path of love. It’s the base of the conversation about poverty and incarceration, as those are issues of human suffering. Where is the conversation of the heart? Of consciousness? 

Segment 3: The Greatest Gift.  The greatest gift that we can give is to recognize the innocence in all people. At the deepest level we are one. Marianne’s latest book is called A Year of Miracles. She defines a miracle as a shift in perception. More and more people are beginning to understand that thought and consciousness determines our feelings, our behavior and what happens in our lives. What role does the expansion of consciousness play in creating a world that is sustainable? If you begin to behave in ways that are maladaptive for the survival of the species, it will do one of two things: mutate and change, or go extinct. It is arrogant to believe that does not apply to the human race. We fight too much, and with weapons of mass destruction. In international and political relations, as well as personal relations, it’s not about thinking about how to change other people so much as it is about monitoring your own behavior. In what ways are we genuinely peacemakers? We need to look at our own mistakes and our own aggression and recognize the ways in which we ourselves have created situations that made it easier for psychotic forces to come forth.

Segment 4: A Transformational Campaign.  Marianne’s campaign showed her that we CAN have a deeper political conversation. That’s the path to change. She wants people to see what a transformational campaign looks like. We need to become more savvy; it’s the direction the country is going to go. Deep down Marianne believes that Americans are decent people, great people, that we have a conscience. To learn more about Marianne and her projects, please visit http://www.marianne.com/.

Dr. Stauffer was an early proponent of Restorative Justice movement (first called Victim Offender Reconciliation). He believes the research – especially the neuroscience aspect - is finally starting to catch up with the practice. Our brains are actually chemically wired to try to find the humanity in another person, and to empathize.

Segment 2: Interest in Healing, But No Opportunity.  There is something magical and transformative about the restorative justice process. The capacity for human compassion surpasses understanding. All we need to do is give willing victims and offenders the ability to do this in a safe space and it simply unfolds.

Carl and his young family spent 16 years in South Africa. A mediation trainer position opened up in Johannesburg and they made their way there, along with their two small children. At that time there was a lot of political violence that he did not take lightly. In their years there they did race reconciliation, post-war reconstruction, and transitional justice. Carl believes South Africa enjoyed a partial restorative justice process, but not a true restorative justice. It gave a voice to victims, and made people accountable. However, there wasn’t an attachment to remorse, and there was little or no restitution. There was a lot of interest from the African communities in mending the harm of apartheid, but no opportunity. 

Segment 3: Justice is a Human Need.  So how do we heal ourselves? How do we find justice in a community context? And what exactly is justice? This discussion doesn’t make sense unless we reframe the definition of justice. Dr. Stauffer defines justice as imbedded in relationships. We need to ask ourselves how we can build respect and accountability and work out issues without violence. This can only happen when we work on relationships; it’s not going to happen by a set of codes or legal parameters on paper. The myth of Adversary Ideology permeates western law and judicial teaching.  True justice is an actual human need.

Segment 4: Revenge Is Short-Lived.  Vengeance arises out of the dopamine center of the brain. However, the problem with our brain is that once you get revenge, you feel no pleasure. We have an escalation cycle of punishment without reward. What’s really interesting is that when you bring people together to work on reconciliation, there is a huge dopamine release as people come to an agreement and feel peace. We get no reward to anticipating peace; we only get the reward when we achieve it. Sweet revenge might be there in a moment, but it is very short-lived.

All the things that the criminal justice system stands on, such as incapacitation, deterrents and rehabilitation, are not being backed up by research. They are not effective and yet we are continue to pour a huge amount of resources into them. With restorative justice we are repairing harm and mending society. To find out more about Carl’s work and the classes he teaches, visit http://emu.edu/personnel/people/show/cds494.

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Segment 2: Build Local Skills for Peace and Promote Mediation Worldwide.  MBB’s Liberian project just ended after a successful 7-year run. The intensive project brought about a higher employment rate as well as less violence among the participants. They have now established a mediation center in the Liberian camp and have been asked to come back and do some work with women in the community as well.

MBB’s mission is simple: to build local skills for peace and promote mediation worldwide. The idea is that practitioners from around the world can actually contribute to building the capacity for peace on every level. They focus on the local level with volunteers who initiate projects with an invitation from MBB. MBB puts out a call for action, collects volunteers who have the necessary skills, and then they’re off and running. Each project looks different, with different participants, different volunteers, different issues, different goals.

Prabha divides their work into two main categories: building local advocacy and promoting mediation. These projects are always in partnership with local volunteers. The goal is to find what is resilient within a particular community and use those properties to rebuild the community after a trauma.

Segment 3: Nepal, Sierra Leone, and More.  MBB also has a Nepal project going, as well as one in Sierra Leone. The organization consists almost entirely of volunteers, with many of them funding their own trips to countries in which they are assigned. Although the long-term impact is difficult to evaluate, there is reason to believe their work is having an effect, even in as short as an 18-month period. Since they work at a local level they leave a group of people who help to train others on the ground. There is a huge range of projects in which MBB has been involved.

Segment 4: A Web of Peace.  Doug believes peace begins with our neighbors. We can’t depend on political leaders or foreign diplomats or NGO. It has to happen person-to-person and face-to-face. MBB creates a web of peace, and that’s where the real change occurs. To find out more about Mediators Beyond Borders, or to get involved, please visit http://mediatorsbeyondborders.org/. They’ll put you to work if you have an interest in being an on-the-ground peacemaker.

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Segment 2: Women Under Fire.  When Sarah decided to write her first book she was still working as a nurse psychotherapist, and realized she needed three things in order to complete this project: a title that she could get behind and that would inspire her, the knowledge that she could write well, and plenty of women to interview. She began interviewing women veterans who were open to speaking about serving in the military. She wanted a wide variety of stories and was open to everyone. She scheduled interviews once a week for years. During an interview she would essentially do two things: write and listen. Her psychotherapy skills came into play as well, as she needed to be fully present and hold the women in a safe and protected way. Sarah conducted interviews with 58 women vets over a course of a few years, ranging from WWII vets to the most current veterans. A mentor who read her manuscript told her she should write about women being abused in the military, which Sarah struggled with, but which eventually changed the shape of the entire project. She ended up with two separate books as well as a website.

Segment 3: Isolated, Ostracized and Shamed.  During her research Sarah started hearing stories of abuse toward women. In listening to their stories, what made an impact on her was the tremendous tenacity and courage of the women who had been abused. It wasn’t just about the assault; it was about what followed the assault. She began to feel a strong connection with these women and was inspired to do something on their behalf. Sarah discovered that there was a culture of abuse toward women in the military that undermines morale and destroys the health, minds, and careers of valuable women soldiers. These women were being subjected to violent sexual abuse. Typically men in the military perceive women as government property that they could do with what they chose. If a woman reports the abuse they are punished harshly. The perpetrators are protected, promoted and permitted to continue. The victims are isolated, ostracized and shamed.

Segment 4: Leadership Fail.  Sarah believes there is a leadership failure within the military, and they cannot “train” their way out of this. There is a sense of entitlement in the military by men, as well as a hierarchical structure within the military so powerful that any woman reporting rape or sexual assault will find her superiors closing rank and protecting themselves instead of the victim. It is a target-rich environment for sexual assault and the leadership does not want to see it, know it, or deal with it. To find out more about Sarah’s invaluable work, visit http://www.womenunderfire.net/.

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Sheryl’s knowledge and study of the Restorative Justice process goes back over 20 years. As a student under Mark Umbreit, she took a workshop and knew immediately that Restorative Justice was the direction she wanted to go in. She began to incorporate restorative dialogue in her work, whether it was in her then-current career or her volunteer work. Mark took her on as a protégé and she began facilitating community mediation and witnessing reconciliation cases. Sheryl has learned that there are moments when you have to allow silence, and just trust the process.

Segment 2: Repairing the Harm.  Defining Restorative Justice is difficult, but Sheryl’s quick definition is: repairing the harm that crime or wrongdoing has created. It’s about putting the situation, the community, and the people involved in a different and better place than before the conflict occurred. There is a lot of prep work that goes into a RJ session, and a big part of the prep is managing expectations. Sheryl’s goal is to make the players on both sides aware of what they might expect in a session and the key elements that are on the table.

Segment 3: The Victim Offender Mediation Movement is Not Going Away.  Doug tells us that Fresno was the birthplace of mediation and also the birthplace of three strikes, which is a striking paradox. Sheryl’s experience with judges and prosecutors has been mostly positive regarding Restorative Justice. However, she’s currently working with a woman from Michigan who has asked to meet her offender. The victim did not know how to precede with a meeting, so she reached out to Sheryl for help. Sheryl approached the Michigan government, including the State Attorney’s office, but they rejected the idea of victim-offender contact. “No contact” between victims and offenders is very staunchly imbedded in their system. Sheryl is starting a ground roots movement to ask Michigan to change their policies and allow victim offender mediation. She believes that this type of movement is not something that is going away. It makes great economic sense and is going to become more commonplace in the future.

Segment 4: Tell Their Stories.  Southern Truth and Reconciliation (STAR) works primarily with organizations that are seeking to do some Truth and Reconciliation (TRC) projects in terms of racial violence that has occurred in some of these communities in the past. STAR partners with communities for projects and outreach programs, which speaks to Sheryl’s passion exploring the Civil Rights Movement. In fact, her first love, as an African American, is researching the Civil Rights Movement and learning how those events shaped her own life and the lives of her parents. Restorative Justice is trying to put a name to the harms that were done and a name to the reconciliation process. Sheryl’s goal with her book is to research and interview larger-than-life figures, like Andrew Young, listen to them, record their stories, and begin the healing process.

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Janine tells us that her Marquette students are very passionate about the Restorative Justice Initiative. Once she is able to get people to understand what RJ is, they fall in love with the process. Her students feel privileged to journey with a victim and find a different way to deal with harm and conflict. The RJ process changes their outlook on life and what they do after they graduate.

Janine and her colleagues also do prison work where they’ve been running a program for 15 years in a maximum security prison. They take 25 high-end offenders serving life sentences and bring them together with victims (but not the offenders’ actual victims). The two groups sit in “circles” for 3 full days, during which they go from building community in the room to having an understanding of how the crimes hurt the victims to everyone telling their stories and doing activities together. It’s a very spiritual and transformative experience for all involved.

Janine’s main take-away from this work is that everyone has the desire to be heard and understood, and that simple dialogue can transform relationships.

Segment 2: There Will Always Be Grief.  In additional to her work in prisons and Marquette’s Restorative Justice Initiative, Janine has a caseload of victim-offender dialogues that she and her coworkers facilitate. These meetings are always at the victim’s request, and the minimum prep time is at least six months. It’s a personal journey for the survivor and the offender to go back in time and process their feelings about this terrible incident. The victims decide what they want to ask and what they want to resolve. The meetings are incredibly powerful. It becomes a flow of dialogue between two individuals, and Janine does not interfere. It’s unbelievable for most of us to think that someone whose child was murdered can sit within feet of the offender. Janine stresses that there will always be grief, but often the victims find themselves in a more peaceful place and with an opportunity to move forward with greater ease.

Segment 3: The Circle.  Wardens who have sat in during the process have been impressed. They tell Janine that they notice a change in the offenders who have participated in the circle for three days. Janine looks at RJ in a broad sense: through the lens of harm, and not just crime. She and her colleagues have facilitated RJ peace circles with high school sports teams to explore un-sportsmanlike conduct, and with racial profiling cases, and with medical malpractice, and much more. The facilitators first need to just get the two sides to meet, and then reassure them that it is a safe environment meant to start a dialogue. It’s not particularly touchy-feely. Many victim advocates fear the process, as if the victims will be re-victimized. Sometimes it’s difficult to get past the advocate to see if the victim is even interested in exploring the process.

Segment 4: Lawyer to Peacemaker.  Janine’s students tell her that they practice law differently because of going through her program. There are many little victories throughout the process, and people’s lives are forever changed. Janine believes if we can improve the way we react, and lawyers can become peacemakers and problem-solvers, then the Restorative Justice Initiative’s teaching will be successful. To learn more about Janine Geske’s invaluable work, visit http://law.marquette.edu/rji/.

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Due to his training in social work, Bill had insights as to why people behave the way they do. As a lawyer he noticed that the high-conflict court cases were driven by the dynamics of personality disorders. The characteristics of these types of disorders include: all or nothing thinking, unmanaged emotions, extreme behavior, and a preoccupation of blaming others.

Segment 2: The High Conflict Personality.  Traits and disorders are a distinction that mental health professionals use that are not significant to the average person, which is why Bill began using the term “high conflict personality.” Although HCP people can look and seem normal at times, they are much more likely to get stuck in a conflict or be triggered by the environment around them.  HCPs are preoccupied with blaming others, and they tend toward all or nothing thinking. Their solutions are extreme and unpredictable.

Segment 3: The C.A.R.S. Method.  When dealing with someone who is a High Conflict Personality, one can manage the relationship by using Bill’s CARS method. The CARS method addresses the 4 key areas of difficulty that people have when dealing with high conflict personalities.

C – Connecting. Form a positive connection with these folks (which can be counterintuitive at times).

A – Analyze. Shift away from emotions to problem-solving. “Let’s look at our options here. What do you propose?”

R – Respond calmly to inaccurate information or hostile communications by using a “BIFF” response: brief, informative, friendly and firm.

S – Set Limits. HCPs can’t stop themselves. We must let them know what the consequences of their actions will be. Educate them and let them have a choice. It’s not personal; it’s about policies, or rules, or external circumstances.

Segment 4: www.highconflictinstitute.com.  The more you think about all these steps and practice them, the easier it becomes. To learn more about Bill’s invaluable work and the High Conflict Institute, please visit http://www.highconflictinstitute.com/.

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Segment 1: Restorative Justice, Defined.  Our guest on this edition of The Doug Noll Show we have the honor of speaking with Dr. Mark Umbreit, Professor and founding Director of the Center for Restorative Justice & Peacemaking at the University of Minnesota, School of Social Work. Dr. Umbreit is an internationally recognized practitioner and scholar with more than 40 years of experience as a mediator, peacemaker, trainer, teacher and researcher. Has is the author of eight books and more than 200 other publications in the fields of restorative justice, mediation, spirituality, forgiveness, and peacemaking.

Dr. Umbreit defines restorative justice as a process as one which focuses on harm done and involves the people most affected by the harm in the response. It’s about offender accountability, victim assistance and support, and community involvement. True restorative justice is a victim-centered movement. It is also rooted in deep traditional and indigenous and spiritual practices.

Segment 2: A Good Track Record.  Dr. Umbreit says the restorative justice empirical research trajectory is quite good. He has been involved with several meta-analysis with samples as large as 9,000+ that found significant reduction in crime by offenders, positive data regarding serving victims, and satisfaction with entire process. In fact, there is more empirical evidence to validate the core principles of restorative justice – particularly the dialogue practices – then there are for most of our criminal justice programs (which are not examined thoroughly).

Back in the 1980s there were zero states that had an administrative protocol that allowed victims of severe violence to meet their offenders. Now, 27 states have procedures to allow that process. Victims of severe violence have far more trauma, loss, and grief than other types of victims. They usually have the need to get answers and express their pain to the person who caused their loss.

Segment 3: Taming the Tiger of Fear and Trauma.  Restorative justice at its core is simple: it’s about treating people with respect and honoring humanity. Dr. Umbreit’s latest book, Dancing with the Energy of Conflict and Trauma: Letting Go – Finding Peace, outlines struggles with conflict and traumatic events in the form of true stories. He has been blessed to learn from a wide range of people over the years --- people who would normally be labeled as trauma sufferers or wounded --- have been his greatest teachers and heroes. Trauma shakes up your perception of life and the world. This book is about taming the tiger of fear and working with it. At the end of the book there are tools to help heal and deal with trauma.

Segment 4: The Forgiveness Agenda.  Restorative justice is an expression of a deep sense of spirituality. To say Dr. Umbreit honors the wisdom and the teachings of Jesus doesn’t cancel out the wisdom and teachings of Mohammed or Buddha. Restorative justice has affected the way he views and understands the world, how he relates to the community, the way he interacts with his wife and kids. Dr. Umbreit says incredible things can occur when we humble ourselves and be mindful of not pushing an agenda of forgiveness on others. We need to recognize that people have a right to be angry and give them time to work through the emotion instead of dismissing or denying it. To find out more about Dr. Umbreit’s important work, visit http://www.cehd.umn.edu/ssw/RJP/.

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Segment 1: Traversing Protractive Conflicts.  On this edition of The Doug Noll show we are speaking with Dr. Alma Abdul-Hadi Jadallah, President and Managing Director of Kommon Denominator (http://kommondenominator.com/), an award-winning woman owned firm dedicated to helping government, corporate, and community clients successfully navigate conflict and cultural. Dr. Abdul-Hadi Jadallah became interested in conflict resolution when she went back to school after raising a family. Additionally, moving to the U.S. and interacting in a multi-cultural society drew her attention to many issues: how people come together, how they interact, what kind of issues they are facing.

Protractive conflicts are characterized as conflicts that are stubborn and continue to happen. Their roots are usually in communities and between different ethnic groups. Yemen is an example of a protractive conflict. It is an internal conflict, primarily ethnic-driven, about the distribution of wealth, equality, the North vs the South, and corruption. There is a lot of violence.

Segment 2: A National Dialogue.  Dr. Abdul-Hadi Jadallah was invited with other experts to go to Yemen and help begin the process of peacemaking with the goal of designing and implementing a national dialogue. They brought in an international committee and started by thinking about what was needed to build a nation on equal rights and equitable resources. What kind of model should they follow? They put together nine working groups that looked at every facet of building a nation state. They mapped the groups and invited delegates to participate. Dr. Abdul-Hadi Jadallah found that this experience proved that dialog can always facilitate difficult conversation, particularly if there are good intentions and good will.

Segment 3: A Different Paradigm.  Dr. Abdul-Hadi Jadallah teaches courses on culture conflict and diversity to Masters and PhD students. She educates the students by giving them tools to analyze conflict, identify conflict, categorize conflict, design a process, and conduct an assessment. Her students see the value of understanding conflict analysis in their day-to-day lives and in the corporate world.

It takes time and effort to resolve a problem, which is a different paradigm. It takes a lot of introspection. Even the most innocent parties of the conflict play a role. Maybe they contributed to the escalation, or were too passive, or didn’t speak up. Additionally, it’s hard for the perpetrator to actually admit they had a role in hurting the other person.

Segment 4: Create a Safe Environment.  Even though peacemaking is well-intended, it can be taxing at times, both for the mediator and the parties involved. You see parts of you in them, and they see parts of them in you, which is difficult. It’s also hard to evaluate the results, although Dr. Abdul-Hadi Jadallah stresses what an opportunity it is to be able to sit across the table from the other side and start a dialogue. At the end of the day, the conflict is not the peacemaker’s conflict. The peacemaker merely creates a safe environment and a process to begin the conversation. To find out more about Dr. Alma Abdul-Hadi Jadallah and Kommon Deminator, visit http://kommondenominator.com/.

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Segment 1: It’s Not All About the Fight.  Mediation is a process by which a neutral party helps people in conflict resolve their issues and move forward in peace. To speak about mediation and how it is used within the legal system we are interviewing Jan Frankel Schau, of Schau Mediation on this edition of The Doug Noll Show. Jan has over 20 years of experience as a litigator, and is also a public speaker, an author, and a mediator (http://schaumediation.com/).

Jan was always drawn to the drama and the narrative of law. Her involvement in mediation happened by accident, when she took a class for continuing education units. She soon discovered that mediation is different in the sense that it has two sides of the story, and the other side might have merit if you dig deep enough. She found with mediation that she didn’t have to be so narrow-minded or laser-focused on whomever had hired her as a lawyer. With mediation, it’s not all about the fight and the win; it’s about solving problems and moving forward.

Segment 2: A Heart Shift.  As Jan dove deeper into mediation she had what she calls a “heart shift” from fight and defend to “let’s work it out.” At that point she knew she was no longer an effective advocate, except for peace and conflict resolution. She didn’t have the fight in her belly anymore.

Lawyers who haven’t been property trained in mediation tend to cram human conflict into a narrow box of legal rights and remedies and processes and procedures, which strips away what makes people human. Mediators have an acceptance of the fact that there can be two truths. Instead of a YES BUT, it could be a YES AND. And out of those two stories emerge a new story of hope and peace.

Segment 3: Middle of the Road.  Jan’s newest book is titled View from the Middle of the Road: A Mediator’s Perspective on Life, Conflict and Human Interaction. It started as a personal self-reflection activity, and turned into a book of real stories with fictionalized characters, plus proven tools and rules for mediators and lawyers. To find out more about Jan’s book, visit http://viewfromthemiddleoftheroad.com/.

Segment 4: Plenty of Room for Peacemakers.  Unfortunately, Jan thinks mediation is a concept that hasn’t quite permeated society yet, although she is seeing more and more innovative programs developed by people with skills in negotiation and conflict resolution. The services are extremely valuable but it’s difficult to get the word out that they are available. She reminds us that it’s important to pull yourself back as a mediator and really listen to your clients. The mediator essentially has two missions: to come to an agreement, and to acknowledge the human side of the conflict. Jan believes there is plenty of room for peacemakers within the context of law. Practicing law is not the only way to help people with their law issues. Visit http://schaumediation.com/ for more information about Jan and her services.

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